Sevens Lucky for Hirleman, Make Opponent Cry
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There was perhaps 65,000 in the pot when we arrived on the river of the 
board, and Day 1a chip leader Mark Hirleman had announced all in to cover his opponent. Said opponent (whose ID card claims that he is Johan van Til; he is most definitely not) pretended to cry, before commencing an epic tank.
"I have two ace," he announced to the table. I put you on sh*t-seven. So, what's the worst?" He continued to tank. "I just wait. Gimme just a minute more." Eventually he called the clock on himself, explaining, "I just do it to people light." The floor lady appeared, and the gent with the decision spent his entire minute hovering his remaining 28,000 or so over the betting line. Eventually she reached one, and then declared his hand dead. He looked surprised, saying that he had meant to call.
"You want to see?" asked Hirleman.
"No," replied his unhappy and now very short-stacked opponent, "Please don't show me."
Hirleman told him that he had in fact had a seven, and he is back up to 187,000.